journal · letter

A Gift, A Letter

To my Soulmate:

So, this is not really a gift, I guess. It’s just a letter, but it happens to be the Christmas season while I write it, so I called it that. Sorry you don’t get any awesome gifts. :P All I have for you is this silly little love letter, and all my love along with it. I hope you don’t mind.

Love or logic? Both have their place and space in the world. Perhaps logic is more useful. Practical and dependable. But in the end, I choose love. It can be practical and dependable… and it can be so, so much more.

From the moment I met you, I knew there was something about you that made me feel like I should know you. At the time, I had no idea what it was. Now I think I do. Who could have known you would become what you’ve become to me? I could never possibly have imagined it. Let me start with this – to me, you are perfect, even in your imperfection. You are beyond compare. Everything about you is more than I ever could have wanted or asked for. Each fault is perfect and beautiful in its own way, because they make you who you are: a complex, fascinating, and extraordinary individual. Oh, I love every flaw and asset, every weakness and strength, every part, inside and out, every single fucking inch of you. You were that intangible person that I used to dream of being real, but had locked away as a quixotic wish, an impossible idea, a futile hope. Yet somehow, someway, through some inexplicably predictable course of events, you are here in my life, and it means more to me than I could ever have hoped or wished or dreamed in my wildest fantasies.

My dear, I am so deeply and fantastically in love with you. I ache to be near you. When I am not with you, I am always missing and constantly thinking of you. You light my heart and skin on fire and send me near to bursting with passion and desire for you. Yet people fall in and out of love all the time. The newness fades, they become disenchanted, disillusioned, and wonder if they have made a mistake. I need you to know that you will never be a mistake to me. So, above and beyond that passion which can border on obsession, I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. And there is not a single thing in this world, this universe, that will ever change it. No words you could ever speak, no crime you could ever commit will reverse it. You will always have a place in my heart, in my soul. No matter where we go from here or what happens next. It does not matter how things end up, or what tricks life has in store for us, or whether you decide to stay or part from my side. You will always be and have a part of me. Always. I know with every ounce of my being that I have found a Soulmate in you. Just knowing that you exist is enough to have made my miserable, useless existence worth something.

So you have my heart now, my dear. Sometimes the depth of my feelings for you scares me beyond belief, but I believe you will keep it safe. Besides, ultimately, I will feel this way for you regardless of any possible consequences, and I will not be afraid for you to know it. Have I told you already that I love you, Mi Querido? :P You make my world go ’round and ’round. So Merry Christmas, and Happy New Year, and always remember that every single word I have written here is the truth. So one more time for good measure, babe. I love you. Absolutely without boundaries. Limitless. Endless.  /forever.



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